Speak With Integrity

Today’s blog is continuation of last week’s:  Our Words – Reflection of our hearts. This time, we are looking at it from a different angle.

I have noticed how sometimes our expressions do not have the effect we wanted to achieve. But we most understand that when we are engaged in a conversation, there is somebody else listening and processing the information. That recipient or recipients have their own backgrounds.

At some point in our lives we have said- that was not what I meant!  By the time we say that expression, something has gone wrong.  Either we weren’t clear enough or the recipient assumed according to his own believes and complexes.

Miguel Angel Ruiz, in his book: The Four Agreements, talks about four pillars or adjustments that we should make in order to live a peaceful life.  One of those pillars is – Be impeccable with your words. This particular chapter can be summarized as follows:  Say only what you mean. Avoid using the Word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your Word in the direction of truth and love.

Whenever we say a statement, it is our responsibility to say exactly what we mean. We could avoid a lot of disasters if we are not ambiguous when we talk. It is very common that we say what we think the other wants to hear, example: you get invited to a meeting / dinner but you know very well that you can’t make it.

It is in that situation that you should say: I am sorry but I can’t. Instead you said: It is going to be tight but I think I can make it. Even though you didn’t say I am sure I can make it, the other person interpreted as “ You were going to be late but you will be there.

As you can see, it is very easy to generate confusion if we are not clear enough. This confusion can create unnecessary crisis and drama.